kitanaa nachaa rahaa hai

Film: Bade Miyaan Chhote Miyaan

Year of release: 1998

Spoken by: Chhote Miyaan (Govinda)

Spoken to: Zorawar Bhai (Paresh Rawal)

Dialogue writer: Rumi Jaffery

Bade Miyan and Chhote Miyan hatch a plan with the police commissioner to rescue the two heroines. They plan to drug Zorawar Bhai and gang. However, their plan fails and Zorawar says, "ab sirf ye donon khaini baby naachenge..come on baby dance".

Zorawar starts shooting and the two Miyans start dancing.

After dancing for three four minutes (on the song Assi nabbe poore taal), they collapse in exhaustion. Then Chhote miyan says,

"ae...(kya hai)... tum kya apne aap ko Mughal e aazam, ham log ka anarkali samajhtaa hai be..kitanaa nachaa rahaa hai."
"ऐ, तुम क्या अपने आप को मुग़ल ऐ आज़म, हम लोग का अनारकली समझता है बे, कितअना नचा रहा है"

Bade Miyan says, "Aap chaahenge to ham roz aakar aapke paas naach jaayenge...ek ghanTaa subah ek ghanTaa shaam. Lekin abhi to jaane do yaar"

Zorawar says, "jaake naacho varnaa goli maar doongaa".

This line has now acquired a cult status. Whenever your boss makes you run around in circles, you can crib using this line. If a public dealing government official is not clearing your file or issuing your certificate, use this line. Make sure you have a clear syllable between the 't' and 'n' in kitanaa. So, कितना not कित्ना.

poochhne ke liye zindaa rehnaa zaroorii hotaa hai

Film : Satya

Year of release : 1998

Spoken by : Satya (Chakravarthi)

Spoken to : Bhau Thakurdas Jhawle (Govind Namdeo)

Bhiku Mhatre (Manoj Bajpai) decides to kill Gurunarayan (Raju Mavani) upon the advice of Satya. Bhiku's mentor Bhau loses his cool when he comes to know of it and pounces on Bhiku saying he should have asked him first

"poochhne kaa naa mere ko" he says in a condescending manner.

Bhiku is at a loss to respond. Satya comes to his aid with

"poochhne ke liye zindaa rehnaa zaroorii hotaa hai"

"पूछने के लिये ज़िन्दा रहना ज़रूरी होता है"

So if your boss questions any decision of yours which has been taken in a crisis and says you should have checked with him/her first, you can use this line.

Agar maarnaa ho to bolne kee zaroorat kyaa hai

Film : Satya

Year of release : 1998

Spoken by : Satya (Chakravarthy)

Spoken to : Bhiku Mhatre (Manoj Bajpai)

An attack is made on the life of Bhiku and his men. All the attackers are killed except one. After interrogating him, Bhiku discovers that it was Gurunarayan (another gangster who had not openly come out as his rival) who had ordered the killing. An angry Bhiku loses control and shouts

"Suar ko ghar meN ghus ke maaregaa maiN"

"सूअर को घर में घुस के मारेगा मैं"

At this point in time, Bhiku has only reacted and has not seriously considered the possibility of killing Gurunarayan. It is almost like we would threaten a close friend with murder. But a very serious and sober Satya converts that reaction statement to an action statement by asking a very germane question.

"Agar maarnaa ho, to bolne kee zaroorat kyaa hai?"

"अगर मारना हो, तो बोलने की ज़रूरत क्या है?"

One of the perennial problem with a lot of people is all talk and no action - which incidentally shortens to a famous Carnatic Raag ATANA. A resolute Satya here is talking of 'Direct Action' - something of the kind Jinnah had proposed.

There are two theories here - one which says that you should not disclose your intentions when you decide to do something. There are others who, like Babe Ruth's famous called shot, believe in saying something and doing it. But at the moment to me, Satya's logic seems stronger

"अगर मारना हो, तो बोलने की ज़रूरत क्या है?"

saamaan to uThaa lenge, aap ko kaun uThaayegaa

Film : Jab Pyaar Kisise Hotaa Hai
Year of release : 1998
Spoken by : Mahesh (Johnny Lever)
Spoken to : Old Man at Lovedale Railway station (unknown)
Dialogue writer : Javed Siddique

The 90s was a period that Johnny Lever dominated as a comedian. Especially the later part of the 90s. He was nominated 7 times during the 90s though he won it only twice. This post marks the debut of Johnny Lever on this blog.

In the 1998 film, Jab pyar kisi se hota hai, he plays the role of Mahesh. He, Suraj (Salman Khan) and Kabir (Aditya Narain) are standing on the Lovedale station railway platform. They have a lot of luggage with them and are looking around for a coolie. A very old man (looks older than Methuselah) approaches them and asks them

"saab mai.n saamaan uThaa loo.n"

“साहब मैं सामान उठा लूं ”

Mahesh replies with a deadpan expression

"saamaan to uThaa lenge, aap ko kaun uThaayegaa"
“सामान तो उठा लेंगे, आप को कौन उठायेगा”
I still laugh when I think of this line and the way Johnny Lever delivered it. There are times when some people – old or otherwise – proffer that they would do things which are beyond their normally estimated abilities. In every such situation you could use this line.

Yeh kaisaa merii taraf hai

Dulhe Raja is one of the most delightful comedies that I have seen come out of Bollywood. It came out in 1998 when comedy was synonymous with Govinda. The story is about Raja (Govinda) who is a dhaabaa waalah (a roadside eatery) who has encroached land within a 5-star hotel which belongs to KK Singhania (Kader Khan). The film revolves around capers where Singhania tries to oust Raja from his land and how Raja constantly outwits Singhania. Singhania has a manager called Baanke (played by Johnny Lever). In the face-offs between Singhania and Raja, Baanke always sides with Raja. While he is the trusted lieutenant of Singhania, he seems to have a soft corner for Raja and helps him often. Singhania gets flustered with this and in one such instance asks him (with hand movements to support the question)

"tum uskee taraf (finger pointing to Raja) ho yaa merii taraf (finger pointing to himself)"

Baanke replies (with hand movements)

"sethji main to aapki taraf hoon (finger pointing to Raja)"

When he is saying this, Singhania looks at his finger's direction and mimicks him

"Yeh kaisaa merii taraf hai (points his finger towards Raja while doing this)"

ये कैसा मेरी तरफ है

Literally it means, you are saying that you are with me, but you seem to be actually with the other person.

Figuratively, it can be used in every such situation, where someone is claiming to be on your side, but actually behaving in a manner which suggests that he is with your opponent.